[ IT WOULD BE HILAROUS. law suddenly in the position of the boyfriend(?) and hk-47 the overbearing/protective parent who just vibes on the porch with a shotgun.....
anyway, he isn't bothered by her confusion or how she looks between him and the bottles. seeing that just last week he told her she doesn't drink and it's wednesday. ]
Yes, and to try again for last week but something different. [ he waves his empty hand in front of his face. ] The other options for pride are to worship me or I guess pamper me.
[ he says "pamper me" in the same tone one would use for "whatever that means". ]
Something that wouldn't get me shot at by our robot friend.
Ahaha, can you imagine if a god worshipped you? [is that blasphemy, she wonders...] Let's go with pampering, for now. Sit down, sit down. And give me those bottles - I have an idea.
[ honestly, it would have been gold if she did allow that to happen, so he's fine to allow her to take the bottles from him as he enters her room. ]
What would that even be called? A god who worships a mere mortal.
[ ""mortal""? :thinking: but he'll go sit himself at the small table in the room. he's polite enough to not prop up his feet anywhere but he slouches. ]
Oh, there's no "mere" about it, you mortals can be quite impressive - but my brother would scold me if he ever found out, ahaha...
[anyway. she takes the bottles and sets them down on a counter in the mini-kitchen, before bustling about to pour him something from the first bottle. that, she sets in front of him.]
Now, there's no pampering quite like being made up - what do you say? Can I give you a makeover?
Spoken like a true god. [ which would sound condescending or, well, should? but she doesn't seem that bad when she says it. he'll take the glass offered to him but doesn't quite drink it yet because... hm..? ]
Makeover?
[ he has an idea what that means in theory but in practice....? ]
[that's kind of all about him, isn't it? even if she'll be having a grand old time styling him up.]
But you'll need to relax first! So... [she comes to stand around behind him and puts her hands on his shoulder.] In the heavens, we usually start with a massage. I've never given one, but I've received a lot of them! How hard can it be?
[ well if she's having fun with it, he's not going to make a fuss about and will help himself to his drink and take a sip of it. it's not bad but what is kind of dubious is the matter of how she is offering a massage and...has never done it before.
surely it can't be that bad??? actually—well. ]
Famous last words, but alright. Show me the best that a god can offer.
[ how much worse can it get? the man has been drinking since monday. ]
[luckily for law, shi qingxuan is not a martial god.
if she was, this would probably be sort of painful. but she doesn't make a habit of punching away her problems, unlike some people, so her touch is light and gentle as she works out some of the tension in his shoulders.
[ gentle but firm, and i forgive you britt. either way it's good. law's likely never had a massage in his entire miserable life so any kind of attempts to work out his stress from his shoulders will feel....weird but also nice.
he didn't know what he signed up for but is low-key reveling in this. especially when one considers the fact that he'll be sipping his drink every so often. truly this is a very luxurious situation that he never thought he would find himself in???
why did they have to do what they did last week..... ]
[ he sure did and now he regrets it because wow!! this feels nice!! never doing that again when he can do this.
or, well. he'll do that when he's feeling particularly grumpy or towards people he would like to bully. ]
There's not a lot of time to relax when you're a pirate. [ he makes a pleasant hum. ] Plenty of people out to kill you.
[ especially a pirate like him but the more she works at the kinks the more relaxed he genuinely becomes. he definitely wants more of this in the future. it's still kind of strange but there are hell of a lot stranger things he could get himself involved in. law didn't see the appeal then but he sure does now. ]
[on the one hand, he's not actively pirating right now. on the other, there are apparently people who want to kill them here if last week is any indication, so, she'll just purse her lips a little.]
Well, you can relax here. I'm hardly likely to kill you.
[wouldn't it be funny if hk-47 popped up and shot at him right now.]
[ LAW LITERALLY CAME HERE FOR A GOOD TIME AND IS BEING ATTACK RIGHT NOW??? last time made sense for him to attack but this???
??!??!???
you know all of that chill he should have had? or, uh, that tension that sqx was mentioning? all of it...back. like, sure, is he keeping his calm? yeah. is he screaming on the inside? also yeah.
he's also a lil drunk so like this is really a lot for him to deal with right now. ]
[strangely, HK immediately listens to sqx and releases Law?? unfortunately for Law's chill levels, he doesn't put him down so much as he just...opens his hands and lets him go]
Confirmation: Understood, Shi Qingxuan. How disappointing.
Query: Was it not the case that you were preparing to strangle this meatbag?
[ law will not fall to the ground like a hapless new born animal but will, unfortunately, still stumble a bit since he was completely off guard (and tipsy). the only real causality right now is his drink which had fallen to the ground.
rip his drink. ]
She was planning on giving me a make-over. Indulgence for Pride.
Query: What is a "make-over"? Are you finally going to replace some of those squishy parts of yours? I am no doctor, but quite handy with a knife and enthusiastic to learn.
Reply: I do not consent to being made into any different appearance or functionality. Especially by clumsy, inexperienced primitives. [he points to Law] This meatbag barely knows what a turbolift is.
[still, he hasn't gone anywhere and his tone is more complaining than actively threatening, as if whatever part of him that could choose who to listen to is malfunctioning]
[ you know, law was about to make some sort of snide comment at hk-47 about what he said but there goes sqx with her own defense... wow?? he hadn't expected her to so quickly snap back at the robot.
huh. then again, she's a god and what kind of a god is a push-over? he'll just mosey over to pick up his fallen cup from the ground before adding his two cents. ]
I don't need to know what a turbolift is to know what it's like to be given a new look. Shame you'll never know what it's like to have a massage.
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anyway, he isn't bothered by her confusion or how she looks between him and the bottles. seeing that just last week he told her she doesn't drink and it's wednesday. ]
Yes, and to try again for last week but something different. [ he waves his empty hand in front of his face. ] The other options for pride are to worship me or I guess pamper me.
[ he says "pamper me" in the same tone one would use for "whatever that means". ]
Something that wouldn't get me shot at by our robot friend.
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she actually snorts at that.]
Ahaha, can you imagine if a god worshipped you? [is that blasphemy, she wonders...] Let's go with pampering, for now. Sit down, sit down. And give me those bottles - I have an idea.
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What would that even be called? A god who worships a mere mortal.
[ ""mortal""? :thinking: but he'll go sit himself at the small table in the room. he's polite enough to not prop up his feet anywhere but he slouches. ]
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[anyway. she takes the bottles and sets them down on a counter in the mini-kitchen, before bustling about to pour him something from the first bottle. that, she sets in front of him.]
Now, there's no pampering quite like being made up - what do you say? Can I give you a makeover?
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Makeover?
[ he has an idea what that means in theory but in practice....? ]
As long as it's all about me, it should work.
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[that's kind of all about him, isn't it? even if she'll be having a grand old time styling him up.]
But you'll need to relax first! So... [she comes to stand around behind him and puts her hands on his shoulder.] In the heavens, we usually start with a massage. I've never given one, but I've received a lot of them! How hard can it be?
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surely it can't be that bad??? actually—well. ]
Famous last words, but alright. Show me the best that a god can offer.
[ how much worse can it get? the man has been drinking since monday. ]
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if she was, this would probably be sort of painful. but she doesn't make a habit of punching away her problems, unlike some people, so her touch is light and gentle as she works out some of the tension in his shoulders.
shut up i don't know how to describe massages.]
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he didn't know what he signed up for but is low-key reveling in this. especially when one considers the fact that he'll be sipping his drink every so often. truly this is a very luxurious situation that he never thought he would find himself in???
why did they have to do what they did last week..... ]
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anyway.]
You're so stiff. How did you even end up like this? [just. working out the kinks in his shoulders.] You really need to relax more, you know.
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or, well. he'll do that when he's feeling particularly grumpy or towards people he would like to bully. ]
There's not a lot of time to relax when you're a pirate. [ he makes a pleasant hum. ] Plenty of people out to kill you.
[ especially a pirate like him but the more she works at the kinks the more relaxed he genuinely becomes. he definitely wants more of this in the future. it's still kind of strange but there are hell of a lot stranger things he could get himself involved in. law didn't see the appeal then but he sure does now. ]
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Well, you can relax here. I'm hardly likely to kill you.
[wouldn't it be funny if hk-47 popped up and shot at him right now.]
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No you won't but—
[ WOULDN'T IT BE FUNNY FOR HK-47 TO CRASH THIS PARTY?? ]
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has the bot always been this quiet? when did he even come in?? why did he even come in???]
Compliment: Well done luring your target into such a state, Shi Qingxuan. I am always a fan of teamwork.
[he jostles her out of the way and, his grip tightening, lifts Law wholesale out of the chair by his shoulders]
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external screaming, too, really, because her voice is a little shrill as she stumbles back, jostled aside.]
HK-47, what are you doing?! Put him down!
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??!??!???
you know all of that chill he should have had? or, uh, that tension that sqx was mentioning? all of it...back. like, sure, is he keeping his calm? yeah. is he screaming on the inside? also yeah.
he's also a lil drunk so like this is really a lot for him to deal with right now. ]
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Confirmation: Understood, Shi Qingxuan. How disappointing.
Query: Was it not the case that you were preparing to strangle this meatbag?
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[HEAVY SIGH.]
No. No, that was not the case.
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rip his drink. ]
She was planning on giving me a make-over. Indulgence for Pride.
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[(closes eyes)]
Actually, it might be easier just to show you. I'll give you one too.
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Do not come near me with any knife, robot, or I'll make you regret it.
[ is it actually an empty threat or him just him blowing smoke? only one way to find out, but he'll turn to sqx: ]
And just how do you plan on giving him a makeover?
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[still, he hasn't gone anywhere and his tone is more complaining than actively threatening, as if whatever part of him that could choose who to listen to is malfunctioning]
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Excuse me, who are you calling clumsy and inexperienced? I'll have you know my skill with makeovers is second to none! My taste is impeccable!
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huh. then again, she's a god and what kind of a god is a push-over? he'll just mosey over to pick up his fallen cup from the ground before adding his two cents. ]
I don't need to know what a turbolift is to know what it's like to be given a new look. Shame you'll never know what it's like to have a massage.
[ and be pampered. ]
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